after many years of planning and being told by Him to wait – i was finally baptized into the Body of Christ on the evening of march 26, 2006. i was even allowed the honor of the first official dunking of the ring community church. even more than that - i was allowed to share in that moment with my community - with my church - with my friends and family. after 3 frustrating years of not understanding why He would not allow it to happen... i would not have had it any other way. i was, and still am, amazed and humbled by the extraordinary love and acceptance poured over me that night. my heart aches at the joy of it, even still. i pray it always does.
His timing intrigues me. in the midst of a cycle of brokenness, He asks me to publicly declare my devotion and surrender to Him. that’s a happy thing to do during good times. it’s much more about obedience, faith and love during this time in my life.
as the band led us in worship and even while josh spoke about the meaning of baptism, i sat on the stairs leading down into the baptismal font, praying about what He wanted from me, how i could adequately convey what He’s done in my life, and asking Him about this odd timing, and i heard clearly from Him for the first time in a very long time. He impressed on my heart in an undeniable way: this is not about me – my life is not my own – my life is not about me – it’s for and about HIM.
i realize that’s a pretty basic precept of our faith. maybe it’s just taken 3 years of walking closely with Him to truly understand that.
now, in my experience, if He takes 3 years to do anything, He’s up to something – BIG. i have an unsettled, anticipatory, sinking, joyous feeling that He’s about to rock my world. He began breaking me in january, and He has not stopped.
a friend of mine told me that when He pulls the rug out from under our lives, it’s because He wants our full attention and focus on Him. well. He’s got it.
