(i love this shot because it's of a bell currently in use in a 600-year-old catholic church - and it has a cross on it, not a crucifix)
i recently had the opportunity to make a quick run into mexico with a team from my church. it was totally last minute that i found out that i was going - less than 48 hours. i say that only to say this - i did not have much time to prepare to go, spiritually. i didn't have much time to ask God what He wanted from this trip personally, from and for me. thankfully, it's a long drive, and i drove the late shift - midnight to dawn or thereabouts - so i had time to pray and think while everyone else slept. even then, much of my time with the Lord was spent thanking Him that everyone was able to get some sleep, praying that it was restful and restorative sleep, and asking Him for safe passage and for His purposes to be accomplished through us - for open hearts and opportunities to deepen alliances with our friends there.
while there are so many stories i could tell, the one that's been circling in my mind since it happened and must be written is, oddly enough, the one thing that i really didn't expect to happen. ok, so if i had thought about it even for a second, it makes perfect sense, and completely lines up with what He's been doing in my life recently. it will come as a surprise to none of you that this trip, for me, was spiritually off the charts. crazy stuff happened. i realize that the Lord shows Himself in different ways, depending on the needs of the people, the culture, the prevalence of the occult... lots of things. i've heard that He shows off big-time in other countries because there is a need for Him to trump the enemy - He chooses to prove Himself 'bigger and badder' than the occult, the poverty, the sheer suffering and need. i know this - i just didn't expect to experience it first-hand.
one of the days we were there, we tagged along with one of our sister churches to a poor (such an understatement) village where there is no running water, no electricity - life is just HARD there. the children are dirty, malnourished, lacking even the basics of childhood like toys and food. it's heart-wrenching. the adults are mostly field laborers, meaning that they harvest crops for large agricultural companies. there is such a need for Hope there... and when you find it, it's AMAZING. faith is taken to a whole new level there... they are completely dependant on the Lord for everything - physically, emotionally, spiritually - everything. there is so much i could write about just concerning that one day, but i think i should stick to what He showed me.
i was given the opportunity to pray for random people - most of whom came up to me. now, you need to understand that i speak very little spanish... i can ask you what your name is, how you are doing, and where the bathrooms are, but that's about it. i can listen to a sermon and pick out references to the Lord, expressions of gratitude, of His magnificence and glory, but i can't speak conversationally... which is what makes what i'm about to tell you that much cooler...
the praying started with a man whose leg was horribly injured and infected. i was hit over the head with instructions to pray for him, and obeyed immediately... when the Lord is that clear on something, you don't ask, you just do. i had to ask someone to ask him for permission to pray for him - it's a cultural thing - and then just opened my mouth and let the words pour out... and the words were not all english. there were definitely spanish words intermingled with mine - did i mention that i don't speak conversational spanish? i was praying for healing, and continue to do so today - he is so heavy on my heart...
there are 3 other people that come to mind, all that came up to me, all that i was prompted to pray for. one woman's story struck me so deeply that even after i prayed for her, i asked one of our friends to listen to her story and speak with her. after they spoke, she prayed for her - we prayed for her... and both of my hands - middle finger to thumb and up to my elbow - turned to ice... not to the touch - from the inside out - the best way i can describe it is to compare it to putting your really really cold feet into really really hot water. i described this sensation to my friend and she was not surprised in the least - in fact, she said that's a common way for the Lord to make His presence known. huh? not in my world... but i wasn't in my world, now was i? that sensation lasted for 2 solid days, and i still feel twinges of it when i talk about it.
the next day, a whole gaggle of us went to a rather large city to go shopping in an authentic mexican market and to see the city. when we finished shopping, we walked to a circa 1400 ad church. now, i say we walked, but it was more like just under a jog - like ducks in a really long line, trying our best not to lose each other in such a large city where people are everywhere and vehicles have absolute dominance in the streets. think bourbon street PLUS speeding cars, trucks, buses... yeah, yikes. anyway... i was at the trailing end of our train of people (may have something to do with being 5' tall) and josh was behind me, as usual, making sure no-one got left behind or lost. we were booking it through a city park-like area, with my eyes constantly scanning the backs of heads in front of me, trying to keep up with our group. all of a sudden, this voice comes out of the crowd, screaming at me. i looked over to see this woman glaring at me. now, my spirit did a bow-up, flip flop thing, but my mind was a little slower to register what was going on. we kept going, but i asked josh what she had screamed at me. his best translation was, "stopping looking at me". now, i wasn't looking at anyone, but when i did, she was decidedly... venomous and well, evil. she wasn't - but the demon inside her was. it saw me coming and warned me off, loudly.
looking back now, i wish i could have stopped and rebuked that thing, setting that poor woman free and introducing her to Jesus. but, it didn't happen that way for a reason, i keep telling myself. there was no way for us to stop and not totally lose our group. it was so unexpected, that we were a full 30 yards away before i realized what had just happened... too late to go back, too late to react. so, what's the next best thing to do when you miss an opportunity like that? pray, pray and pray some more. in thinking through it, rebuking that demon would have been Christ through me, and that happens in the spirit world, not in person. it would be terribly arrogant to believe that my presence is necessary for that woman to be delivered from possession. so... i continue to petition God through Christ on her behalf, knowing His heart, knowing He wants her set free so much more than even i...
given a little perspective due to time and distance, i have to wonder what all that was about. why did the Lord ramp up the spiritual side of things for me? i don't claim to know what He did in the lives and hearts of the others on the team, i just know that for me, this trip was crazy... and it makes me wonder what He's up to for the big trip in april. if there is one thing i've learned about the Lord, it's that He doesn't just do things. He doesn't just decide to cause my hands and arms to turn to ice. He doesn't just decide to point me out to a demon and have me perceived as a threat. He does these things for a reason - many reasons, more than likely.
one of the many flaws that i discover about myself when i go to mexico is that my immediate heart reactions are not geared toward the people there. yes, this is hard to write, but it's true. my heart goes out to the animals, suffering from injury, disease, neglect and abuse. my heart goes out to the environment that is so polluted from unregulated factory emissions. yes, i know that the Christ in me is about saving souls and setting captives free. i know this. i also know that we are all wired differently... and that He's the One that did the wiring. maybe that's why i experienced such personal, relational encounters this time...
while there are so many stories i could tell, the one that's been circling in my mind since it happened and must be written is, oddly enough, the one thing that i really didn't expect to happen. ok, so if i had thought about it even for a second, it makes perfect sense, and completely lines up with what He's been doing in my life recently. it will come as a surprise to none of you that this trip, for me, was spiritually off the charts. crazy stuff happened. i realize that the Lord shows Himself in different ways, depending on the needs of the people, the culture, the prevalence of the occult... lots of things. i've heard that He shows off big-time in other countries because there is a need for Him to trump the enemy - He chooses to prove Himself 'bigger and badder' than the occult, the poverty, the sheer suffering and need. i know this - i just didn't expect to experience it first-hand.
one of the days we were there, we tagged along with one of our sister churches to a poor (such an understatement) village where there is no running water, no electricity - life is just HARD there. the children are dirty, malnourished, lacking even the basics of childhood like toys and food. it's heart-wrenching. the adults are mostly field laborers, meaning that they harvest crops for large agricultural companies. there is such a need for Hope there... and when you find it, it's AMAZING. faith is taken to a whole new level there... they are completely dependant on the Lord for everything - physically, emotionally, spiritually - everything. there is so much i could write about just concerning that one day, but i think i should stick to what He showed me.
i was given the opportunity to pray for random people - most of whom came up to me. now, you need to understand that i speak very little spanish... i can ask you what your name is, how you are doing, and where the bathrooms are, but that's about it. i can listen to a sermon and pick out references to the Lord, expressions of gratitude, of His magnificence and glory, but i can't speak conversationally... which is what makes what i'm about to tell you that much cooler...
the praying started with a man whose leg was horribly injured and infected. i was hit over the head with instructions to pray for him, and obeyed immediately... when the Lord is that clear on something, you don't ask, you just do. i had to ask someone to ask him for permission to pray for him - it's a cultural thing - and then just opened my mouth and let the words pour out... and the words were not all english. there were definitely spanish words intermingled with mine - did i mention that i don't speak conversational spanish? i was praying for healing, and continue to do so today - he is so heavy on my heart...
there are 3 other people that come to mind, all that came up to me, all that i was prompted to pray for. one woman's story struck me so deeply that even after i prayed for her, i asked one of our friends to listen to her story and speak with her. after they spoke, she prayed for her - we prayed for her... and both of my hands - middle finger to thumb and up to my elbow - turned to ice... not to the touch - from the inside out - the best way i can describe it is to compare it to putting your really really cold feet into really really hot water. i described this sensation to my friend and she was not surprised in the least - in fact, she said that's a common way for the Lord to make His presence known. huh? not in my world... but i wasn't in my world, now was i? that sensation lasted for 2 solid days, and i still feel twinges of it when i talk about it.
the next day, a whole gaggle of us went to a rather large city to go shopping in an authentic mexican market and to see the city. when we finished shopping, we walked to a circa 1400 ad church. now, i say we walked, but it was more like just under a jog - like ducks in a really long line, trying our best not to lose each other in such a large city where people are everywhere and vehicles have absolute dominance in the streets. think bourbon street PLUS speeding cars, trucks, buses... yeah, yikes. anyway... i was at the trailing end of our train of people (may have something to do with being 5' tall) and josh was behind me, as usual, making sure no-one got left behind or lost. we were booking it through a city park-like area, with my eyes constantly scanning the backs of heads in front of me, trying to keep up with our group. all of a sudden, this voice comes out of the crowd, screaming at me. i looked over to see this woman glaring at me. now, my spirit did a bow-up, flip flop thing, but my mind was a little slower to register what was going on. we kept going, but i asked josh what she had screamed at me. his best translation was, "stopping looking at me". now, i wasn't looking at anyone, but when i did, she was decidedly... venomous and well, evil. she wasn't - but the demon inside her was. it saw me coming and warned me off, loudly.
looking back now, i wish i could have stopped and rebuked that thing, setting that poor woman free and introducing her to Jesus. but, it didn't happen that way for a reason, i keep telling myself. there was no way for us to stop and not totally lose our group. it was so unexpected, that we were a full 30 yards away before i realized what had just happened... too late to go back, too late to react. so, what's the next best thing to do when you miss an opportunity like that? pray, pray and pray some more. in thinking through it, rebuking that demon would have been Christ through me, and that happens in the spirit world, not in person. it would be terribly arrogant to believe that my presence is necessary for that woman to be delivered from possession. so... i continue to petition God through Christ on her behalf, knowing His heart, knowing He wants her set free so much more than even i...
given a little perspective due to time and distance, i have to wonder what all that was about. why did the Lord ramp up the spiritual side of things for me? i don't claim to know what He did in the lives and hearts of the others on the team, i just know that for me, this trip was crazy... and it makes me wonder what He's up to for the big trip in april. if there is one thing i've learned about the Lord, it's that He doesn't just do things. He doesn't just decide to cause my hands and arms to turn to ice. He doesn't just decide to point me out to a demon and have me perceived as a threat. He does these things for a reason - many reasons, more than likely.
one of the many flaws that i discover about myself when i go to mexico is that my immediate heart reactions are not geared toward the people there. yes, this is hard to write, but it's true. my heart goes out to the animals, suffering from injury, disease, neglect and abuse. my heart goes out to the environment that is so polluted from unregulated factory emissions. yes, i know that the Christ in me is about saving souls and setting captives free. i know this. i also know that we are all wired differently... and that He's the One that did the wiring. maybe that's why i experienced such personal, relational encounters this time...
1 comment:
Great post Ann. Really. I've enjoyed the last few actually. Been keeping mum about it b/c... well, I don't know, but they've been really good lately.
Reading your story my smile got bigger and bigger. I recognize you are a fighter. And apparently so does the enemy. Its so great to see that even after you passed "it" you still had the courage to lift the woman in prayer. That ROCKS!
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